Semester Break 2 .

      I am stuck at home for my sem break . It's not that I am complaining or anything . I am having fun but I wanna go on a holiday too . LOL . 

I want I want I want !!! *screams like a little kid* 

      Neways Nik has been accepted to UiTM . Congrats Nik !!! I feel sad that I can't send her off to her dorm since it's a million miles away . Okayyyy , I may have been exaggerating a lil bit but it is still far . It's in Perak and to me anything outside of KL is a million miles away . I have car sick you knowwww . Heh . I am glad we managed to spent time together before she leaves but it was kinda boring cause the movies we chose was horrible and I wasn't feeling well . I am still glad tho we managed to see each other . =))

      Andddd it is almost 2 in the morning here and can you believe a house on my street is still having an ongoing construction in the wee hours . Are they freakin serious ? . If I have a gun I'll shoot em dead . =P

Misses and Regrets ?

      Ever think that wishes can actually come true ? . Not only in fairy tales . Wishes that you make when you are little , around 11 or 12 , and this is how the wish sounds '' I wish I can be a grown up so that I can buy stuff and whatever that I wanted that my parents said is too expensive'' or something like that . Have you guys ever wished that kind of a wish before , to be a grown up quickly ? . Not just to buy stuff but because you just want to be a grown up because you don't want to hear your mother's nag and stuff ? . So the wish here is about being a grown up and quick at that . So here I am at the tender age of 18 , scared to death about death itself as thought I am 90 and scared of losing my loved ones . Yes , for real , I feared about these two things so badly that sometimes all I can do for the whole day is curl up in bed and cry my eyes out .

      Oh how I wish for so many times that I can actually take back whatever stupid wishes that I made and throw them in the garbage and never think of them . The fear of leaving my teen years overwhelms me sometimes . I do not think I'll ever be ready to live on my own let alone grow up . I know we have to grow up sooner or later but it really scares me . Whenever you do mistakes it is no longer easy to wriggle yourself out of it like you how always do with just that cute little puppy eyes of yours and smiling like you did when you are little , you will actually have to take the blame for it this time . Oh how I wish I can turn back time and really appreciate my childhood times . How I wish that I can actually spend more time with my parents instead of doing stuff on my own in my room . And stop hating people so much cause life is too short for hates and enemies .

      I still remember when I was 15 , a grown up told me that you should really enjoy your teen years cause being a grown up is not easy and all I could think of was this person is lame , how could you tell me being a grown up is tough , you'll get to do whatever you want and you call that tough ? . How I thought wrong . I hate my ignorant self , seriously . Oh and I even posted something about me will never ever ever not even for a million years missing my school . Haha , after 7 months all I can think of is to go back to school and be 17 again . 18 seems to be so old for me . Very old . Is not that I miss my friends or whatever cause I still get to  see them but it is just that I missed the atmosphere , the ambiance , the environment . :) .

      I also miss Disney Channel Original Movies . The series and movies are just fun to watch  . 10 years ago their movies are more about appreciating families , friends and it usually portrays good morale values . Time has change and their movie is no longer about these stuff anymore , it is now more about pop star , how to be popular and let's just say it is not like how it used too . I missed the moment when we set our alarm at 9 am every morning on the holidays just so we can watch DCOM together , me and my sister . We rarely get to do stuff together anymore . We are so busy living our own lives that we have little time for each other . Oh yes and the times when vulgar words are so prohibited that you ger so scared if your parents catches you using one . Nowadays all I can hear is vulgar everywhere and even my friends use profanities . Great huh ? . 

      Yeah , my childhood time was fun and full innocence . LOL . And it is not like I am old or anything but it is just that I feel I have wasted 10 years of my life but I know I wasn't wasting my time . And whatever decisions I make , made who I am today and we as human being are like magnets to wrong doings and we can never change that . So I guess I am not going to regret whatever I did but I am just going to learn from it . So to whoever who is reading this post should live your life to the fullest so that you won't have to regret later on . Even if you are 50 it is still never too late . :D .

Reminiscing the old times 8D .

Okay , let's talk about the real me . 

Have you ever wondered what I really am actually ? . Nice ? . Bitchy ? . Fake or just about anything ? .

      

      What I can say about myself is that I am so not people friendly . As you can see, if only I know you will then I talk to you , if not I will just smile and nod accordingly to that person but nothing more , even tho she or he is my classmate or whatever . I will never be or act rude towards a person UNLESS he or she has crossed the line . I may look nice and sweet on the outside and yes I do sometimes wear my feelings on my sleeves but never ever talk bad about my family or friends . I would either yell at you which I rarely do or I would just storm off .

      I always find it funny when people want to take advantage of me because of my kindness . When they know that I can actually stand up for myself they were so gob-smacked that their expressions becomes so priceless . I am not pretty as what the models in the catalogue look like but beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder right . I feel very thankful that I was never being tormented for my chubbiness or whatever except for this one friend when I was in primary school who always mock me because I guess she hates me because I was different ? . I would always go back home crying and my sister and mom would be clueless on how to deal with me at that time . I would always feel so less of myself and I was at the age of growing up . It was really bad for my confidence level and it was a very dark time for me as I don't really know on how to defend myself . I didn't know any better and I was absorbing whatever she said to me like a sponge . Not until recent years that I managed to understand why she did that to me . With my rational thinking I managed to 'decode' her strange behavior and it was because she was insecure , very actually . 

      I guess she comes from a broken family and there was too much anger in her . And with that I was her punching bag . If I would actually turn back time , I would tell myself there's nothing to be scared off , as the girl who is tormenting you is actually much more timid than you are . I would tell my younger self all her dirty little secrets and I would ask my younger self to torment her until she beg for my younger self to stop . How great will that be . But for whatever she had done to me has now become a part of me . I learned from it and it made me a better person . So nah , I would actually say thank you to her for making my life miserable before as it has make me a tough person like I am now . Whenever you feel angry or having any resentments towards somebody because of what they did to you , remember there is a higher power who is capable of doing anything , and His name is God . What I have observed is that , God is just . You don't really have to do anything bad to someone who oppresses you as whatever god's punishment is will be so much worst than what you are capable of doing to that person . 

I went to a school  full of raging hormones . I am not even joking . Some of the girls were so fake that you can actually see the plastic-ness on their skin , who is so geeky that they barely look up from their books and girls who are just plain mean and torturing people is part of their hobby . Oh yes I've seen all kinds of girls . But of course there are still some who are just plain innocent and nice . Nobody is perfect aye . I was the background type of a girl . I excel in my studies but I wasn't at the top . I wasn't popular but I was a prefect . Let's just say I am an average kind of student . lol . I used to have friends who say that I am only friends with  popular girls to gain popularity . And there are even some some who says that I am gedik without them knowing me . lol . Oh well we can stop people from talking can we . 

      Oh yeah , I said I was a prefect right ? . At first it was something so huge for me that I was really really really excited just to be one . I was never popular and being a prefect is a major step up for me , or so I thought it was and boy was I wrong . It was horrible , horrendous actually . but the others were alright with it . I didn't have any close friends in the board and it was , you know how whenever you see uh the type of girls who chooses only their close friends who are so bad at that particular job but pick them anyways cause they are their friends ? Yes , in that prefectorial board these kind of species inhabits the place . So the one who is so call 'lame' by them gets all the dirty work or the kind of work that they don't even want to go near to . After half a year I started regretting my decision , I felt so stupid and I had never regretted anything as much as this . But oh well , as I say before this kind of experience have made me who I am today . I managed to learn from my mistakes and I really try to avoid having myself involve in this kind of situation again . 

Okay this post is getting longer and longer and I will stop now , for a while . There will be more to come . *claps* .

Bored Out Of My Mind .

       I did sleep boy was I tired . I was alone in the surau and it was really peaceful . I read my book for a while and I was also thinking of doing some finance work but I think I had just about enough with assignments for a while . I slept for around half an hour and then came Aishah asking me to wake up . :( . LOL . I still want to sleep you know . My head is pounding now .

        I am so bored , that is why I kept on updating my blog . If we were told earlier that the class was cancelled we would or I would have still sleep in on my comfy little bed . Hate . Pfft . =.='' . I can't go back home as there is another class and I didn't bring my car today . How annoying . Yeah I am so not going to car pool anymore . Really .

Can I skip econs too ? . Pretty please ? . :/ .

Not again .

      Finance Mid-term is really hard , the kind of hardness that makes you want to curl in bed and sleep . Like seriouly . I am so worried that if the mid-term pon I can barely do , what about the finals . Damn . The finance lecturer cancelled her class , again . I dunno why but recently there are too many classes that have been cancelled . Call me a whiner or whatever but isn't it not fair that the lecturers can cancel the classes just like that but if we want to skip class or whatever we have to have solid reasons . Ehh purleaseeeee .

      So here I am now stucked in the library , hacking the computer to go on facebook and stuff . I should have brought my lappie . That is always the case huh , when you need to use the lappie , you end up leaving it at home. I find it very funny cause all I can hear in this library is me typing away. LOL .

      Aishah was a little late just now , but it is alright , Bangsar is always jam . Car pool-ing was um normal ? . LOL . But I prefer to drive on my own though . I <3 driving . :D .

      I seriously dunno what to do now . I can't finish up finance cause I dunno what to do . I don't want to sleep either , maybe I should go and sleep . I'm gonna head up to the surau later lah , and sleep . LOL . :O . Naughty aliah . :P .

Till then , buhbye . :D .

Alhamdullilah , Yay . :D .

     At last my Big Economy Project is done . What is left for me to do is to just print it out tomorrow morning . I hope I wake up early tomorrow . I must actually . Aishah offered me a ride to college and she said she'll hantar me back too . :O . I hope . LOL . If not I won't have transport tomorrow . :O .

     I still have not finish my finance project and quiz . Oh my . What am I supposed to do tomorrow . =.='' . Anyways , need to sleep now . It is 12.47 am already . Goodniteeeee . :) .

Stupido .

Blogspot is being shitty . I just finish up writing about what I did the whole day and blogspot didn't save it . THANK YOU SO MUCH DUMB DUMB ! . 

SNAP .

     12.24 am . I should have slept at least 2 hours ago . I want to wake up around 6 tomorrow . Please , please let me wake up . I have my econs mid-term tomorrow . :O . I've studied , I guess , lol , last week . I wanted to refresh my memory today but I was just plain lazy . 

     I just found out that the big econs project is due this wednesday . I am not even halfway there . Seriously ? . I have finance assignment that is piling up , oh my god . I am so stressful now . I just pray hard I will not be too lazy and so that I can start finishing up all of my assignments by this week . Ya Allah , let me have the strength to do it .

:3 .

Fate ? .

      I guess it is fate . And when it comes to fate , you must accept it and move on . I hate this sentence . It is easier said than done . Like seriously . I have been crying and crying and crying . I find it to be too surreal , like as though it is a dream . I still hope it is a dream . Please , oh please . 

      But it is still better than having cancer or some sort . I am indeed very thankful . Alhamdullilah . I <3 you Allah . I am going to held my head up high and be strong cause Allah always give us trial that He knows we can handle . I guess I just need time to digest everything into my brain . :( .

:'( .

     I couldn't even begin to describe it . I'm hungry as hell right now , but I really don't feel like eating . I don't want to do anything anymore . I just want to bawls my eyes out and sleep . :( .

What Happened ?

    That was funny and it was only a joke . In fact it was only between us , there wasn't anyone else to see it or torment you with . And you cried ? . Am I the one here is not being sensitive or is she the one who is over-reacting ? . Now I'm confuse . It's common lah to do jokes between siblings and its common for sibs to just laugh it off , but it's uncommon running away crying and sulking . Okay , maybe I was too much but still I am at lost here . Was I really bitchy ? . But it was seriously JUST A JOKE . Oh well , it's her loss . I think I won't do as much joke as I had wanted to anymore . Haih .

Happy Halloween ! . :D .

      Ya, Allah it is not getting any better but it is getting worse . Insya-Allah , its nothing :( .

      And oh yeah , we watched Ghost Whisperer like oh so many episodes until I totally lost count . LOL . It was for Halloween Special . I watched it with my sister and it was awesome . Mummy fell asleep after few of the episodes , lol . :D .

Not to forget Happy Halloween peeps ! . :D .

Random .

    I slept the whole day again . I hate that . :( . Haih . Maybe we are going out to One Utama later . Oh nais . :D . I really want to eat something with a soup in a bread thingy . :D .

Surreal ? .

Tornado hitting Malaysia ? . Woah this is scary , I wonder what will happened if it hits KL . I just pray to god , it won't . :O .

Sigh .

Went to the Women's Specialist Clinic today , and before I can even get into the clinic I saw the doctor going out to her car . Oh What The Heck , I just have to wait till monday .


I slept around 3 and I woke up around 12 and now I am still SO SLEEPY . What is wrong with me ? . Haih . :( .

Should I ?

I am still in pain . Mom said she is going to take me to the doctor for the second time tomorrow . Nervous =.='' . But now I have to focus on my Finance Quiz . Oh yeah :( .


P.S : Just came back from pavi , the movie takers is alrite :) .

Friday Morning . :)

    Just came back from having breakfast at Chawan . Okay , menggedik gila orang-orang kat Bangsar . Haha , I hate looking at their faces . =.='' . Maybe they were hungry , lol . 


    Last night after having dinner at Plaza Damas , I watched TV until I fell asleep with my make-up still on my face . So not good for this oh so not perfect skin . Haih . I was even wearing my contact lens when I fell asleep . Yeah , you can imagine , when I woke up to pray , my contact lens were sticking to my eyes like as if it were glued to it .


    Oh , and what is with The Big Bang starring Miley Cyrus ? . Is it a song ? . I saw it on E News last night and I was pretty curious about it . :O .


    Oh my it is almost 1 o'clock now and I haven't started doing anything with my assignments . Heh . =.='' . And I know I won't be doing anything tonight as tonight is family night and we usually go out for dinner at pavi and watch movie straight after . Oh well , I must start finishing up my assignments then . :( .

Hello again . :) .

   Geez , has it really been two months ? . Like seriously ? . Wow , 2010 is moving way too fast for my liking . Still the same ol' me . Except for my disorder I guess . It's getting much better Alhamdullilah , it is still there , lingering at the back of my mind and causing me fear but it is some how manageable . :) 

  It has been 2 months since my first sem exam , and Alhamdullilah , even though I didn't get 4 flat as I had wanted , I still managed to be in dean's list with a pointer of 3.83 . :D . I am grateful of course , very actually . It was totally a confidence booster after my SPM tragedy , a come back I must say . Hehe . My second sem final is in a month's time . It will come in a flash . LOL . Wish me luck , I'm gonna try my best even though Finance Sub.  is a little pain in the ass .

   I am still as fat as a bear would be , lol . Still have not managed to shred the pounds :( . It is okay , I will still try and try and try . It is already maghrib and I am gonna go and pray now . Hehe . :) . Oh yeah , and I tell myself I will start writing again if I have the time . :) . 

Anxiety Disorder .

    Yes . I think I am suffering from it . It is actually pretty frightening I tell you . I used to be this laid back girl who couldn't care less about anything , exams , what people say or just about anything . I am so relaxed that even when people are going crazy caused by their exams I can still be on my lappy and online-ing my ass off . Yes , I was that care-free . 

     Now even the slightest thing can make me go berserk and make me worry like hell . I worry about lots of stuff . Me dying , hell , my parents dying , the last day , bad people , this and that . What I can say is that I worry about things people around my age won't even care until they are old . I worry about not being able to my old self . I worry that I will be like this until I am old and I'll die cause I worry so much .

     What I hate about having anxiety attacks is that you feel hopeless , you feel as though there are no one for you to reach out to and ask for help . I sometimes cry out of the blue because of  I worry so much . Even when I am with my closed ones I don't feel safe . I feel as though everyone else is happy but me . 

     I want to go to the shrink so that I could some meds . When I told my mom about the idea she said the meds won't help you in the long run . I kinda know about that but I just want to stop worrying but now I am trying my best to cope with it . I know when this phase is over I will come out a strong person . Insya-Allah . 

Day 3 .

It is now 2.18 in the afternoon . I was supposed to go out today but Aishah can't make it . What a bummer .

I really wanted to go out today and shop . Thank god mummy said let's go shop tomorrow . At least I can go buy the flats that I had been eying on since last months . I wanted to buy the flats but since I still have so many shoes that I have still not worn , mummy will surely make noise .

I want to organise a sleepover this weekend but I'm not sure whether they can make it or not . Erk . I'm bored . Please jadi . Pfft .

I've been thinking about weird stuffs again . I dunno what's wrong with me . It's scary to have that kind of thoughts . I think it's a phase . I will just have to endure it for the time being .

P/S : I'M BORED . :/ .

Day 2 .

I fasted again today .  I wanted to go out but there was no car for me to use . So yeah I'm bored . 


Oh yeah , I lost 2 kgs . Yay me . Alhamdullilah . Another 23 more kgs to go . :) .

Semester Holiday , Day 1 .

I am going to write everyday for this semester holiday to keep me occupied and not bored . So here goes .

Yay , I am on a holiday now . Cant't wait to keluar with friends and stuff . But what's holding me back is that I am a 'driver' now . Yes , a driver . I have to pick up my sister my dad , thank god my mom tak payah . Pfft .

Anyway , I am going out this Wednesday with Aishah, Insya-Allah . I still have yet to go out with Syaima and Nik . And I will make sure I go out with them . I miss them loads .

I want to freaking shop . Since I've negotiated with mummy about my allowance and she said yes to it even its a holiday . Yay me . So , I think I can save up money to buy shoes or go outings with friends . Double yay . :P .

I am praying hard that I get to be in Dean's List . INSYA-ALLAH . I seriously want it . I want to prove to not only everyone but myself . After the SPM disaster my self-esteem needs some boosting . :( . Its okay . I kinda terima what I had gotten even tho I am very much disappointed in myself . But I asked for it by not studying . So I am very grateful to Allah . :) .

Oh and I am fasting today . Insya-Allah takde half-half cause I want to muntah or watsoever . I have to be strong . :) .

Eh The Writer Is Still Alive ? .

I am so stressed up lately that I have been thinking of such awful stuffs that I can't get it off my mind .

This week is an exam week which is also an adding factor to my stressful-ness .

I am done with English exam , but there are still two papers left accounts and marketing .

Help me god with Marketing .

It's like studying history but it involves businessy thingys .

Blergh .

Nobody reads this stupid blog anyway(s) .

I am so annoyed rite now and I dunno why . =.='' .

STUP much ? .

Here I am in the library , annoyed, frustrated and irritated .

Movies That I Have Watched in May .

Iron Man 2 .

Robin Hood .

Nightmare On Elm Street ( twice ) .

Shrek Forever After .

The Bounty Hunter .

Prince Of Persia : The Sands of Time .

First Impression .

The first day of orientation was awkward but I managed to make friends . I can somehow identify potential friends and potential nemesis . LOL . It was a total culture shock cause I am not used to having boys as classmates and I DONT really like it . I am from an all girls school and in CBN we are somehow trained to have manners and stuff . Its not like they don't have manners or anything it is just , you know , boys will ALWAYS be boys . They act like hooligans and they are proud of it , and one thing I don't like is that they can't control themselves , to me when the elders or your seniors are talking , show them some respect and behave ATLEAST normally . Save the lame jokes for someone who gives a damn to laugh . And have some dignity please . If you are trying to do a joke , make sure the joke is not on you as you'll look like a fool .

I complained to my mom and I even cried because I can't stand some of the people there . It's like you know how the malays say it , bodoh tapi sombong . Some are stuck up and they think they are all that but the are mostly chicken shit . I am pissed cause its like I show you respect but instead of returning the favor back to me you slap me in the face . That is how I feel . And you even think that I'm dumb as a dumb person could be and its freakishly irritating to me . Who the heck are you to have the right to look down on me ? . Ni lah kerja org Melayu . Instead of helping each other out , they are more interested in bringing their own race down .

I know bashing about people on blogs and stuff is just plain childish but you don't expect me to go to that person's face and say What The F is wrong with you , do you ? . LOL . Nah , I won't do that . Not until that person does something bitchy and out of line . People kept on saying to me that Uni life is the time you will cherish so much . (My ass) . But I guess I beg to differ . This is what they said when I was in high school . I wasn't even sad to say goodbye but I literally dance my ass off as I said BYE BYE SCHOOL . LOL .

My family said , ''Aliah , you have to learn to loosen up . Don't be so uptight . Just have fun and stuff '' . I seriously don't know whether I can or not . I just don't . If any of you terasa or upset by my bad language or anything , I'm sorry . But this is just how I feel .

Oh No You Don't .

Damn . I'm not feeling well . =______='' . Aliah's body please don't fall sick . I hate being sick .

Movie Review . :D .

Robin In The Hood .

:D .

It was dirty .

The people in this movie is dirty .

I feel like washing them with soap , lots of it .

LOL .

Okay enough with thoughts of washing people .

Russell Crowe is the main actor .

He was , Hot .

:D .

I freakin hate King John .

But I knew beforehand about King John's cruelty from my dad .

So , I kinda expected the ending .

When you watch the ending , you'll feel like killing that STUPID KING JOHN .

But who doesn't aite ? .

LOL .

The story is long , but you wont really feel it , as it is quite a fast paced movie .

SO , go watch it .

There's funny moments and sad moments .

It's nice to watch with family .

BUT not for kids though because the jokes are a bit grown up-ish .

:) .

Hantu Shopping . LOL .

Here I am 5 something in the morning and widely awake . I slept at around ten-ish and woke up around 4 . LOL . My body clock has gone hay wire . :O . Never mind about this . This post is not about my body clock or whatever .

We went shopping yesterday . And we went crazy . Even though KLCC was not having sales . I bought three blouses , a jeans , a handbag and a pair of earrings for Bausch.K . Sissy bought 2 blouses , a jeans and a pair of high heels . She's a giraffe enough without those shoes making her look so much taller . Hehe . Mummy bought two slacks I think . And two pairs of shoes . :S .

So , as I mentioned it wasn't sale time . And we bought quite a number of things . And the bags that we had to carry was like about 9 to 10 bags . And people were staring at us because of the so many bags that we had to carry . And I was kind of struggling with it cause it was pretty heavy and long while I am short . LOL .

We were like Mak Ciks carrying the bags all over . And it was so damn tiring and I was also feeling hot . Strangely . LOL . But I guess I had a really good time walking and carrying that many bags because usually we don't shop at the same time . Its like , sometimes me and my sister will shop or my sister and my mom . It's better that way because we won't feel like we are carrying rocks .

Nevertheless I can't wait to shop with my hantu shopping again . Haha . I just hope they wont go crazy like they did yesterday . :D .

Random Thoughts .

I am so lazy to update this dying blog that nobody reads anyway .

=.= '' .

Happy Mother's Day Ma ! .

I will not post up the pictures here .

If you wanna have a peek , take a look at my FB .

:) .

Anddd , I did a very bad thing .

Not very lah , just bad .

And I won't undo it unless that stupid person apologize to me .

In the meantime , I'll wait until I am bored of waiting .

Till then .

Adios .

Movies That I Watched in April .

Clash Of The Titans .

How To Train You Dragon .

The Lovely Bones .

Date Night .

Shutter Island .

The Losers .

When In Rome .

:) .

Awwww :) .

Somewhere between
the incessant forwards
and the friendships and the calls
to each other complaining about cRuSHeS and
BF/GF!! Somewhere between the phone calls to old
friends and the "I miss you's", the "I love you's" and
the "What are we doing tonight's?" And somewhere
between all of th e changing and growing..
somewhere between the classes and the skipping
classes.. and the StUdYiNg for teStS.. And the
PRETENDING to "StUdY" for TeStS..
And the downright NOT StUdYiNg for TeStS..
I forgot -- I forgot what ScHooL was all about.

Somewhere between all the appointments, starbuck's coffee,
and McDonald's.. paying bills and then not paying bills..
Making plans then breaking plans.. Appearing, Disappearing,
then reappearing.. I forgot -- I forgot what it was like to cry.
I forgot that pretending to be happy doesn't make you
happy.. And that pretending to
be sMaRT doesn't make you smart .. I forgot
that you can't just forget the past in
fear of the FUTURE.. I forgot that you
can't control falling in LoV e..
And that you can't make yourself fall in *LoVe*
.. I learned that I can LOVE.. I
learned that it's okay to MeSS uP..
And it's okay to ask for HELP!!!.. And it's
okay to feel like crap.. I learned it's okay to CoMPLaiN
and WHiNe to all your friends for a whole day..
I learned that sometimes the things you want
most you just can't have and the things that
you look for are right in front of you.
I learned that the greatest thing about
ScHooL and uni and the working world,
it isn't about the parties or the
DRiNKiNG or the Hookups..

It's the *FrIeNdShIpS*, which means taking chances.
I learned that sometimes the things we want to forget
are the things which we most need to talk about..
I learned that TIME and LOVE can heal all things..
I learned that just when you think it can't get worse - it does!..
but with the love and support of friends - you survive..
I've learned that when you start feeling BaD
about L O S I N G touch and about those that you've lost!
They too, are feeling the same way..

I learned that letters from friends are the
most important things. And that sending cards to your
friends makes you feel better! But, basically, I just learned
that my friends.. Both old and new.. are the most important
people to me in the world AND.. without them, I wouldn't be who
I am today..

So this is a THANK YOU to all of my friends..
For always being there. And even if we're not on good terms
or we have lost touch.. I will have an unconditional
love for you.. ~aLWaYs aND FoReVeR~

3 Words . I Hate You .

I think I've had enough of her BS . She's acting like a spoil brat . And it is annoying . She act as though she's the victim . And I looked like the bad guy . My mom is even rooting for her . When I do bad stuffs she will scold me but when my sister does it , my mom treat her oh so nicely and gives her whatever she wants . I've had enough of my annoying , bratty sister . And I swear to you if she won't stop behaving like an evil psycho bitch someone is going to lose their precious bitchy head .

=__________='' .

I Hate You Whites .

I HATE AMERICANS .

There I said it . Okay , not all maybe but mostly . I feel like shaking them and say don't u guys realized that u people were the one provoking them . You started the war . And now you blame the Muslims ? . Gosh . I've been watching videos on youtube about how they treated Muslims in America . It was disgusting . Their behavior towards the Muslim people was repulsive . They are bunch of ignorant monkeys who I freaking loathe at . I don't understand how a human being can be so mean , so inhumane , so beasty . Their words , their actions , and just about anything that they do makes me wanna puke . They are all animals . How can u treat a human being like that ? .

Examples of what the Americans say to the Muslim people .

Towel Heads = A woman wearing a Hijab .

And a lady wrote this as her comment on a video at youtube :

And if you are wearing ur religion at ur sleeves , you should be ready to face the consequences .

What the heck ? . What happened to your so call free country thingy ? . What happened to it , you bunch of ignorant people ? . Huh ? . You Americans are just lousy people that I have lost respect to . Seriously .